Contemplative Time Beside the Fire

The photograph above was taken as I sat beside a fire on my farm in Bulgaria contemplating the news of my father’s death, feeling into his spirit now free to roam wherever it likes I felt his presence with me there.

If I had a regret it was not being able to walk the valley with him, but now I know we can do it in spirit. It was a beautiful experience seeing my father’s form in the flames, appearing to share the view with me.

My father was a mycologists and this was one of his gifts to me as I grew up looking for fungi in the woodlands of England. His enthusiasm for gathering mushrooms is now passed onto my two boys who joyfully harvest the abundance that emerge from the forests of Bulgaria.

The rain fell overnight to clear away the energy of the day before, quenching the heat of the fire left remnant in the ashes, but giving life to a fresh fruiting of mushrooms in the meadows and woodlands of the mountains.

I am grateful for the time that was given me in the few weeks before the ceremony to celebrate my father’s death. This allowed me the space I needed to spend time in nature sharing my thoughts with the trees, while I walked the mountain forests with my boys picking mushrooms.

Here are the words I read in the service….. :

“Firstly, I would like to thank you all for coming to share in this celebration of my father’s life and I trust you are enjoying his choice of music and hymns.

He will be greatly missed by many, but while we often experience death with great sadness, I know he would want us to remember him with happiness and joy in our hearts.

I wrote the following words as part of my own process and now I would like to share them with you.

I invite you to find your own connection to the following and feel into the depth of the messages that may emerge from between the lines.

A son’s relationship with his father can be one of, if not the most significant influence on both their lives. I am fortunate enough to have experienced both sides of this having become a father of two boys myself.

The insights I have gained have been incredible from both, and seeing the father son relationship from different perspectives has deepened my understanding even further.

I no longer believe in coincidences, because I know synchronicity happen for a reason. From the moment we are born, intuitively we learn things from our parents and as we grow up together these insights start to define the world in which we live.

I believe we are at an incredible point in time, where, as a race of people, we are being offered an opportunity to heal the emotional traumas that have been passed down through the generations.

I am particularly thankful that in the last couple of years, my father and I shares some beautiful moments of mutual acknowledgement that will stay with me for the rest of my life.

My father lived a long influential life sharing his gifts with family, friends and the many students he tort, through which his influence will have an impact for many years to come.

The open enthusiasm with which he shared his knowledge and perspective of life is an energy I resonate with myself. Through the process of sharing comes an even greater depth of understanding.

Life is full of opportunities, but so many are lost, because they are perceived as negative situations of difficulty or challenge, surrounded by resistance and fear.

However, these times of difficulty and challenge offer us the greatest opportunities to dig deep into our resourcefulness and discover new personal insights, strengths and abilities.

Life is full of opportunity, so that is not a problem, it’s our depth of awareness that makes the difference. It’s our ability to see the opportunities, grasp them with both hands and expand into them with all our consciousness.

That’s what makes the difference and that is where real growth happens… Emotionally, Psychologically and Spiritually.

I am fortunate that I have been offered many opportunities and now I am aware enough to take advantage of more of them.

Living close to my parents for most of my life I have had great opportunities to learn from them and through them, sharing experiences and making observations.

One of my father’s gifts to me was his scientific mind always open to understanding a new idea or perspective, constantly researching and learning.

My father’s passion for natural history is something that has influences many aspect of my life and is now also passing onto my children as they play with the wildlife in Bulgaria and gather mushrooms with me on the mountainsides, forests and meadows.

His life’s work researching our family history is another great gift and one that I have only recently realised the value of, because we are influences by the thoughts, actions and beliefs of many generations of family members before us.

I can now share this information with my boys and my father’s legacy offers transformative potential for our family into the future, physically, mentally and spiritually.”

Nothing lasts;
But nothing is lost;
There is only change;

And with change comes opportunity…….. 

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